More Non-News: World’s Oldest Person is Now Someone Slightly Younger
The World’s oldest person died the other day. She was 115. This would be interesting if she was the oldest person who ever lived, but she was a full 7 years shy of that record.
So now the oldest person goes to someone else who is a month younger. She’ll probably die soon too, and another article will be written with the exact same headline and the cycle will continue. Guess what people – there will always be a world’s oldest person and they will always die. This is not interesting news.
Personally, I really hope I don’t live to 115, unless they have artificial replacement everythings for my body in 2089. I can only hope that our robot overlords will be so kind.


August 31st, 2005 at 5:47 pm
The oldest person in the world tends to die often. Very strange conspiracy.
September 1st, 2005 at 8:13 pm
Something like 20% of the people who have ever lived have never died, and I’m one of them!