More Non-News: World’s Oldest Person is Now Someone Slightly Younger

August 31st, 2005 | Jeff Boulter | General

The World’s oldest person died the other day. She was 115. This would be interesting if she was the oldest person who ever lived, but she was a full 7 years shy of that record.

So now the oldest person goes to someone else who is a month younger. She’ll probably die soon too, and another article will be written with the exact same headline and the cycle will continue. Guess what people - there will always be a world’s oldest person and they will always die. This is not interesting news.

Personally, I really hope I don’t live to 115, unless they have artificial replacement everythings for my body in 2089. I can only hope that our robot overlords will be so kind.



2 Responses to “More Non-News: World’s Oldest Person is Now Someone Slightly Younger”

  1. Dave Says:

    The oldest person in the world tends to die often. Very strange conspiracy.

  2. Todd Says:

    Something like 20% of the people who have ever lived have never died, and I’m one of them!

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