I’m pretty sure there was a Faustian bargain made some time ago that went something like this:<\/p>\n
Medical school flunky:”I really want to sign my checks with ‘Dr.’ and drive a Porsche but memorizing ALL those body parts is too hard.”
\nSatan: “OK, I can make you a doctor, but your job will consist of menial, repetitive tasks and all your patients will hate you. You’ll probably decide that suicide is a better option.”
\nMedical school flunky: “But I get the Porsche?”
\nSatan: “Yes.”
\nMedical school flunky: “Sounds good!”<\/p>\n
Then Satan created dentistry. Suddenly human teeth required several sessions of dedicated maintenance per day brushing, flossing and washing. Otherwise teeth would become extremely painful and simply fall out.<\/p>\n
It certainly explains why for thousands of years of human history there are no dentists and suddenly it’s one of those ‘required’ things you must do.<\/p>\n
How else could you explain that of all your body parts, this particular one requires so much maintenence? Skin and tissue grow back, bones heal. I don’t spend any time cleansing my elbows meticulously and they seem to work just fine. My cat has yet to see a dentist and I have plenty of marks to prove his teeth work just fine.<\/p>\n
Why is it that you only get two shots at healthy teeth and one of those comes at an age when you’re too young to really care? I think we should get our second set of teeth around mid-life, say 40. Or maybe we can cross-breed humans and beavers. Their teeth never stop growing and they must continuously gnaw on hard stuff like wood to file them down. I chew up enough pens; that should be sufficient.<\/p>\n
This is all very suspicious. It could only be the work of Satan.<\/p>\n
Oh, if you’re reading this Dr. Yu — nice Porsche. No, no I’m kidding really. I’ve been flossing, really I have. Please don’t hurt me (any more than usual)!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I’m pretty sure there was a Faustian bargain made some time ago that went something like this: Medical school flunky:”I really want to sign my checks with ‘Dr.’ and drive a Porsche but memorizing ALL those body parts is too hard.” Satan: “OK, I can make you a doctor, but your job will consist of …<\/p>\n