I reached 500 Facebook “friends” today. My first thought was “I have 500 friends?” Really, for not being that social of a person, it seems impossible that I could know that many people and share a real mutual liking with them.

Of course, it is impossible. I don’t have 500 “friends”. I have 500 people comprised of a small number of real friends, along with hundreds of current and former coworkers, relatives, and people I’ve only “met” online.

Years ago, I was obsessed with “collecting” friends on Facebook. It wasn’t popular outside universities back then and you’d friend people you barely knew just to see what would happen. Now that everyone and their mother (literally) is on Facebook, it’s time to raise the bar.

500 people is too many to keep track of and I’ve decided to never go over that number. Every time I add a new worthy Facebook friend, I’m removing another. Here’s who’s on the chopping block:

1. You, who devotes all your status messages to promoting your product/company/service/religion. If I wanted to watch advertisements, I’d turn on a TV.
2. You, who does nothing but complain about your significant other/parents/pets/kids/job. I have my own problems and I don’t want to be constantly be confronted with all of yours too.
3. You, that person from high school who never wanted to talk to me in high school. Now you want to me my “friend”? No thanks.
4. You, who logs on to Facebook only to share your results of the “Which Potato Chip are You???” quiz.
5. You, the obnoxious, arrogant Yankees fan. At least until January. Win at least one recent World Series before you start talking about dynasties, OK?

I’m still in awe of the power of Facebook in connecting such an incredible number of people. It has truly changed the internet forever. I can’t wait to see where it goes from here, along with just 500 of my closest friends.